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Name:
Location: Kansas City, Kansas, United States

I live in K.C. with my wife, Kim, and our 5 kids (which we homeschool). I've been a believer in Jesus Christ since 1993.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Dad isn't missing, he's been systematically excluded

There's a heartbreaking article in the Boston Globe today. In "Two Moms and No Dad -- For Now" Virginia A. Smith writes:

"When 10-year-old John was 3, he told me one morning as I was driving him to
preschool that not having a dad made him feel sad. He has said this on a number
of occasions over the past seven years. We do what we can to fill the gap. He's
very athletic, and we take him to play baseball, soccer, basketball, and ice
hockey, anywhere that men congregate to coach and cheer on their sons.
I have come to love the fathers of his teammates at the testosterone- soaked hockey rink who slap my son's helmet and say, "Way to go, John!" I love his first-grade teacher, who has become his unofficial Big Brother and who takes him to Red Sox and Celtics games, Northeastern hockey games, mini-golfing, and bowling. I love the father of one of my son's friends who takes him camping and teaches him to build rocket launchers. These men are godsends, but sometimes I wish we could have provided my son with a real live father."



This breaks my heart. You have a boy who wants a dad...who desperately needs a dad. But the selfishness of this woman has denied him that. I know this is going to sound harsh, but if women were meant to have babies without men, IVF would not be needed. Asexual reproduction would be possible in humans. Here we're seeing a glimpse of the damage done by the myth that children raised in homes with gay parents turn out o.k. They may seem normal and well-adjusted on the outside but all of the pain of what they're missing is internalized. They likely don't say anything for fear of hurting the parent but the pain is there nonetheless. She laments, "...sometimes I wish we could have provided my son with a real live father." Well, I tell you what, Ms. Smith...if you had thought of that before you decided to go off on your own and have a child in a decidedly unnatural way just to satisfy your own desires then all of this could have been avoided. But now you have to watch your son grow up wondering what it's like to have a "real live father." Congratulations. Good job. I'll pray for you and your son that God will work in your hearts and that this experience will help your son to see the harm done when children are denied a father (or a mother). I pray that God will draw your son to Himself and grant him salvation and that you, too, will be drawn to repent. I pray for your daughters that they don't grow up believing that "gay is o.k." I ask that God would grant them the wisdom to see how wrong any sexual activity outside of heterosexual marriage is wrong and that God would lead them to be pure, chaste, godly women who seek after him and that they would marry and that God would bless them with many children.

My heart aches for this woman and her family. I hurt for this little boy who has no father, as I hurt for any boy in that kind of situation (whether in gay households or single-parent homes). Lord help them.

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